dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
