my sisters under your porch take her home
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize