Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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