i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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