are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
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