Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
