I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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