One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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