Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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