STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
