i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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