hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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