im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
