Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
