Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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