Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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