My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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