I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
