One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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