You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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