So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
