I cannot find my penis.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
