Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
