he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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