the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize
