I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
