I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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