you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
