Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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