butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I want to make a zoo with you.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
