so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
