Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
