saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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