Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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