He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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