i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we made out on top of his cat.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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