They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
