I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize