Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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