you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
