omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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