Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Barsexuality is the new black.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
