So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
