I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
