Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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