HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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