I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
