Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
