girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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