We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
